Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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