just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
