i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
