belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage