I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I'm both gender and math confused
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
