so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
His nipple licking is glorious
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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