Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
