im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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