Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
