Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
