i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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