I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Michael Bay diarrhea
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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