why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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