i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
