how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
As shirtless as possible
your like the ambassador to my penis.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize