i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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