maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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