You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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