what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
