Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
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Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
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She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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