Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in