It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
