i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize