You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Four minutes until I can fart!
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
