New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize