How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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