omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize