so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
