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I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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