But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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