Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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