bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
