Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize