I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?