I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
