The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
