why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
