Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
is it fun? or sober?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
