Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
