Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
