her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
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