he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize