Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
