we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i may or may not be watching the land before time
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Randomize
