From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
