So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
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after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
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Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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