I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
