Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Randomize
