You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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