Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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