her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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