If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
